Always have faith...

There have been good times, and bad...dark and light. But for the sake of trying to be therapeutic I will stick to what I am doing at this very moment. Today I reapplied for disability, I also contacted an SSDI atorney, I talked to a few friends and took my meds and made some awesome smoothies. I put magnesium and vitamin C in them to make sure I am getting some nutrients during my wisdom teeth healing process. It hurt like hell and was a bit rushed. but I got it done. I also got interviewed today for the OC weekly about my fundraiser. I am so blessed an touched that people are willing to go out of their way to help me so much. It was hard to relive some of the moments I have gone through with this disease. Talking about the nights I laid awake in tears from pain were hard to remember. It feels like yesterday, but still so far away. I know now that I need to stay in the moment and not think about anything else. I need to get serious and stand up on my own two feet and make a stake for my life. This is no longer a game, but a real situation that could turn nasty.

So I am back at my Moms house...its a lot nicer than east LA. My wisdom teeth are gone and are still causing lots of pain and numbness in my body. Who wouldn't freak out if half your body went numb all the time...I cant even feel my left hand that well right now, hahaha. Crazy stuff. I played bass for 20 minutes today, but it always seems to creep up on me and bite me back in the ass when I stop. Now my left arm is killing me...o well. It was fun while it lasted.

I also hit a thousand dollars in my fundairser!!! Its only been a week and a half. pretty awesome. Thanks guys!


My father is very religious, and I am now staying with him for a little while. I was baptized Catholic and went to Catholic school, I was an alter boy, and I did the whole bit. But there have been so many things I got wrong. I did not have faith in God, or in others. Now I am coming to find that truly no man is an island and no one can do it on their own. I know successful people who are rich, and are CEO's, Music stars, etc etc...and some of them made it there on their own, some are happy and others aren't.